I guess when I started my road to full time femininity I thought everything was going to be rosy and the world would welcome me with open arms. Did I ever have a lot to learn! After a few months of being a lady of leisure I decided to get a job, just part time at first. I didn't really need the money then but it would be nice as I had discovered a woman's expenses are more than a man's. If you don't believe me just check out the prices of woman's clothes compared to men's. A man buys 3 pairs of underwear and they last him years while panties seem to lose their shape quickly, but I digress.
I couldn't rely on my degree and I had the non-compete contract so I started hitting the shops and malls putting in applications. Nothing. After a month or so I was so depressed I didn't know what to do with myself. I remember meeting a friend for lunch at a little diner not far from my place and as we talked she pointed they had a sign in the window stating help wanted. I asked for the manager and he said he was looking for a waitress for the breakfast shift, 5:30AM to 11AM. I had no experience but I told him I was a quick learner and promised to always be on time so he said he would give me a chance. Be there the next day at 5:30 in the morning wearing a black skirt and a white blouse, the standard outfit for all the waitresses there. That was 4 1/2 years ago and I am still there!
If none of you have ever worked as a waitress believe me it is hard work. I run my butt off everyday bringing your breakfast, refilling your coffee countless times, making sure your order is right, busing my tables, and taking cash along with taking and getting carry-out orders and all the side work involved. And I get a whole $3.50 an hour for that. Trust me we earn our tips! Too make sure I am there on time I get up at 4 in the morning, or earlier if I have a bout of insomnia like tonight, get dressed, do my make-up, do my hair, and out the door I go. There are always things that have to be done before we even open up at 6 for breakfast and on a typical Sunday the crowd starts about 8 and we go until 2 in the afternoon serving breakfast. Don't get me wrong I love my job and I have my regular customers that treat me well but it is still work! I have to do my nails almost everyday as the solution we use for wiping down the tables is hell on nail polish. If I get two days out of a pair of pantyhose it is a miracle, and the nurses shoes I wear to work last about 4 months before the support is gone and a new pair is needed so tell me how easy my job is!
Oh well better get into the shower it is already after 4, don't want to be late for work!
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Being Me
Like I said earlier, give this girl a Saturday morning and she has energy, I lived as a man for years and learned to accept my fate. Both my mother, God rest her soul, and my sisters knew of Deidre and were as understanding as they could be and as time went on learned to accept me as Deidre. They knew I was going to be me regardless of what they said or felt and as we were a close family, my father passed away when I was barely 8, they welcomed Deidre.
I plodded through life and was coping when my mother became terminally ill when I was 47. I remember one of the last times I visited her in the hospice she made me make two promises to her. First when we had her funeral she wanted an evening of just her children and she wanted Deidre there. Secondly that I would follow what my heart. I promised both her and when she passed away 3 weeks later the first evening's viewing was just the 3 sisters. I believe that evening brought the 3 of us closer together and they vowed to support me regardless of my life style.
The opportunity to make good on my second promise to my mother came a couple of years later. The company I had worked for over 25 years was being sold to a competitor. I had always made good money and had been wise with it, hoping to retire early so I was not rich by a long shot but I was comfortable. My house was paid for as were my two cars and I did not live extravagantly. After the sale was complete several of us were offered buyouts. Granted a non-compete contract was demanded of me but I was glad to sign that in return for the generous settlement offered me. I agreed to stay on for 6 months at my current compensation to help with the transition but that first day after I signed the buyout I visited my therapist and was given the OK to start HRT.
I was 2 months shy of my 50th birthday that last day of work. I was excited about the future yet scared and unsure of what lay ahead for me. I remember having a tear in my eye as I pulled out of that driveway for the last time. I got home, changed out of my male drab for the last time, poured myself a drink and sat on the deck watching the sunset wondering what tomorrow would hold for me.
Was I scared? Yes! Did have any idea of what I was going to do? No! Was I ready for this? I thought I was. Did have any idea what I had gotten into? A very definite NO!
Looking back I can say it has been a lot different than I dreamt it would be and in many ways scary but if I have any regrets at all about what I did it is I only wish I had done it sooner.
I plodded through life and was coping when my mother became terminally ill when I was 47. I remember one of the last times I visited her in the hospice she made me make two promises to her. First when we had her funeral she wanted an evening of just her children and she wanted Deidre there. Secondly that I would follow what my heart. I promised both her and when she passed away 3 weeks later the first evening's viewing was just the 3 sisters. I believe that evening brought the 3 of us closer together and they vowed to support me regardless of my life style.
The opportunity to make good on my second promise to my mother came a couple of years later. The company I had worked for over 25 years was being sold to a competitor. I had always made good money and had been wise with it, hoping to retire early so I was not rich by a long shot but I was comfortable. My house was paid for as were my two cars and I did not live extravagantly. After the sale was complete several of us were offered buyouts. Granted a non-compete contract was demanded of me but I was glad to sign that in return for the generous settlement offered me. I agreed to stay on for 6 months at my current compensation to help with the transition but that first day after I signed the buyout I visited my therapist and was given the OK to start HRT.
I was 2 months shy of my 50th birthday that last day of work. I was excited about the future yet scared and unsure of what lay ahead for me. I remember having a tear in my eye as I pulled out of that driveway for the last time. I got home, changed out of my male drab for the last time, poured myself a drink and sat on the deck watching the sunset wondering what tomorrow would hold for me.
Was I scared? Yes! Did have any idea of what I was going to do? No! Was I ready for this? I thought I was. Did have any idea what I had gotten into? A very definite NO!
Looking back I can say it has been a lot different than I dreamt it would be and in many ways scary but if I have any regrets at all about what I did it is I only wish I had done it sooner.
Introduction
I have been meaning to do this for a long time but like so many things in my life I never got to it. Today the time has come to start on a new leaf.
First let me introduce myself. My name is Deidre Elizabeth, I am soon to be 55, maybe that is what got me started today thinking about turning the double-nickel. My story id long and complex but I started out a crossdresser and through the years I came to realize with the help of others that I was truly a transsexual. Many things prevented me from taking the transition step in my earlier years but 5 years ago everything fell into place so I jumped at the chance. Now I live and work as the woman I should have been born.
I have to admit things were a lot different than I imagined they would be when I started all of this. There have been many trials and tribulations and yes there were times I was about ready to screw it all and walk away but I knew this was my fate. Where all of this goes I am not really sure, maybe you can help guide me as to what you want to know.
Oh well, here I go taking yet another plunge into the unknown!
First let me introduce myself. My name is Deidre Elizabeth, I am soon to be 55, maybe that is what got me started today thinking about turning the double-nickel. My story id long and complex but I started out a crossdresser and through the years I came to realize with the help of others that I was truly a transsexual. Many things prevented me from taking the transition step in my earlier years but 5 years ago everything fell into place so I jumped at the chance. Now I live and work as the woman I should have been born.
I have to admit things were a lot different than I imagined they would be when I started all of this. There have been many trials and tribulations and yes there were times I was about ready to screw it all and walk away but I knew this was my fate. Where all of this goes I am not really sure, maybe you can help guide me as to what you want to know.
Oh well, here I go taking yet another plunge into the unknown!
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